Post by wizardmon599 on Jul 21, 2006 8:22:31 GMT -5
I'M the one that needs advice this time...
What would you do if your enviorment that was once full of trust turned cold,heartbreaking,and almost un-loving?
What would you do if everything that came out of your mouth was accused of being a lie?
What would you say to try to make people believe that you're telling the truth?
What would you do if you were so un-trusted that you almost felt like you were just one big LIE?
Have you ever been so un-trusted that you're not even sure WHAT the truth IS anymore,even if you hold to it?
You wanna know something? I now have to live my life asking these questions.
What would you do if you had everything,except the things that you really need?
I had to trade a loving family for a house with everything with a family,but no love.
EVERYONE in this house knows me as the 'lying teenage bitch'...I have no fucking idea what the hell I did to make them all treat me so isolated,but whatever I did,it must've been bad...I'm accused of lying so much,that I'm not even sure when I'm telling the truth any more...People in this house make me feel bad.
They make me THINK that I'm lying,even when I couldn't be more truthful.
When my mother was alive,she trusted that I know what's right and what's wrong,and that helped me a lot when it came to learning life-changing lessons.
By being given the choices,even at young ages,I was able to see what could hurt me and what I could do to help me in situations...
From expirence,I learned that telling the truth was MUCH more helpful than lying...
...So,why would I lie if I already know it'll get me in deeper shit than I'm already standing in?
I wish people in this house would take time to think about things,instead of just accusing everything I say of being a lie.
Worst of all,these....PEOPLE...Are trying to drag what I want to do down. They don't care about my performing...And I'm really starting to doubt that they give a lick of care about ME.
I understand their schedules....
I understand that they aren't happy that I want to be DOING things instead of sitting on my lazy ass...
I even understand that they've been lied to countless times by their OWN kids...
...But I don't understand why they don't trust my mother's judgement when it comes to trusting ME...
From now on...
I'm not going to talk to them.
Everything I say is a lie.
I'm not going to listen to them.
No matter what they believe,they speak bullshit.
I'm not going to comfort them.
Hell if they ever gave a shit about me.
I'm not going to be around when they need to yell at someone.
I've got my own world with my own things to do,that DOESN'T include them.
I'm not going to participate in anything with them.
They're my family...But they're not the ones that really love me.
And lastly...
I'm not going to give up.
I'll perform if I want to,damn it.I've got friends in high places that'll do anything for me,and whether they believe it or not,I know what's right and what's wrong.I know what will hurt me,and what won't.And someday I'll prove it...
But for now,
I have to love them.
For now,
I have to appreciate everything they've done.Good and bad.
For now,
I guess I have to live like a bird in a cage.
But,
I guess for now isn't forever...
And maybe
I should be the bitch
They always accuse me of being...
But I'd rather just stay me.
What would you do if your enviorment that was once full of trust turned cold,heartbreaking,and almost un-loving?
What would you do if everything that came out of your mouth was accused of being a lie?
What would you say to try to make people believe that you're telling the truth?
What would you do if you were so un-trusted that you almost felt like you were just one big LIE?
Have you ever been so un-trusted that you're not even sure WHAT the truth IS anymore,even if you hold to it?
You wanna know something? I now have to live my life asking these questions.
What would you do if you had everything,except the things that you really need?
I had to trade a loving family for a house with everything with a family,but no love.
EVERYONE in this house knows me as the 'lying teenage bitch'...I have no fucking idea what the hell I did to make them all treat me so isolated,but whatever I did,it must've been bad...I'm accused of lying so much,that I'm not even sure when I'm telling the truth any more...People in this house make me feel bad.
They make me THINK that I'm lying,even when I couldn't be more truthful.
When my mother was alive,she trusted that I know what's right and what's wrong,and that helped me a lot when it came to learning life-changing lessons.
By being given the choices,even at young ages,I was able to see what could hurt me and what I could do to help me in situations...
From expirence,I learned that telling the truth was MUCH more helpful than lying...
...So,why would I lie if I already know it'll get me in deeper shit than I'm already standing in?
I wish people in this house would take time to think about things,instead of just accusing everything I say of being a lie.
Worst of all,these....PEOPLE...Are trying to drag what I want to do down. They don't care about my performing...And I'm really starting to doubt that they give a lick of care about ME.
I understand their schedules....
I understand that they aren't happy that I want to be DOING things instead of sitting on my lazy ass...
I even understand that they've been lied to countless times by their OWN kids...
...But I don't understand why they don't trust my mother's judgement when it comes to trusting ME...
From now on...
I'm not going to talk to them.
Everything I say is a lie.
I'm not going to listen to them.
No matter what they believe,they speak bullshit.
I'm not going to comfort them.
Hell if they ever gave a shit about me.
I'm not going to be around when they need to yell at someone.
I've got my own world with my own things to do,that DOESN'T include them.
I'm not going to participate in anything with them.
They're my family...But they're not the ones that really love me.
And lastly...
I'm not going to give up.
I'll perform if I want to,damn it.I've got friends in high places that'll do anything for me,and whether they believe it or not,I know what's right and what's wrong.I know what will hurt me,and what won't.And someday I'll prove it...
But for now,
I have to love them.
For now,
I have to appreciate everything they've done.Good and bad.
For now,
I guess I have to live like a bird in a cage.
But,
I guess for now isn't forever...
And maybe
I should be the bitch
They always accuse me of being...
But I'd rather just stay me.